Relationships That Work

Enlightened relationships fulfill all aspects of our lives. We trust each other and we feel we are on the same team so we like to help each other. There is a deep sense of belonging. We discuss important issues together. We laugh together. We love to express our sensuality freely, with enthusiasm and a sense of discovery. We feel powerful enough to be vulnerable in each other’s presence. We communicate with honesty and openness from our authentic selves. We are nurturing a seed of love that blooms into a flower that expands its essence to our surroundings. As we love, we feel a connection that goes beyond our bodies. We start sensing that we are more than our body and become conscious of the divine connection. We want to live fully and contribute to life.

In other words, life together is safe, sexy, powerful, loving, expressive and expanding beyond our bodies. Read more

Positive Body Image – for Love and Great Sex

It is unfortunate that so many women listen to the media advertisements about what looks good; implying that if you spend money on changing something about your body, only then you will be successful and loved.

It is a trap many women fall into if they have not developed a sense of inner value, or depth. A strong sense of self-esteem is the key to a positive body image. Read more

Carla's Book: Tantric Tango Dancer

In her book, Lessons from a Tantric Tango Dancer: A Journey into Intimacy, Relationships and Love, Carla Tara inspires readers with the courage and persistence she summoned in her life as she struggled against the limiting beliefs she had absorbed as a child. Successfully changing those beliefs catapulted her to the foreground of the spiritual growth movement. Read more

The Art of the Kiss

I received some email concerning kissing. People want to know what makes a good kisser. As with everything else, taste is different and everyone has his own kissing style. I can tell you, however, what most woman who study with me like, myself included.

Most women at the beginning of foreplay love having men look into their eyes and show their attraction and longing to “take them”, yet also appreciate a man who takes time to gently kiss the woman’s lips gradually, increasing the intensity by sucking them one at the time and even both together. Most women don’t enjoy having lovers stick a tongue in their mouth without having given them a chance to wet their own lips in response to that longing . . .

Both women and men like a tongue that is not too stiff, or too loose, and a tongue that moves with confidence. It’s a real turn-on when a lover knows the art of kissing and adapts their technique to the person they are with. For instance, I don’t like the lizard-like fast flicking of the tongue, but another woman may appreciate it. You must be ready to make the change to suit your current partner.

How do you adapt? By observing and connecting with the breath of your lovers.

Often your lovers hold their breath because they don’t like something about the kiss, and they don’t know how to communicate about it. They are reticent about communicating either because they don’t know how to express it, or because they want to protect their lover’s ego. They might be in their heads figuring out what to do. However, by not communicating, they sabotage a possibly amazing sensuous relationship… and the pain of a relationship ending is most often worse than the risk you run when you communicate what you want and gently guide your lovers to give it to you, thanking them all the way for approaching what you want.

The worst kiss I ever received had his saliva was dripping out of my mouth like it would from a dog salivating. Having to wipe myself off was a huge turn off.

The best kiss I ever had lasted a long time, and my lover and I were alternating looking in each other’s eyes and seeing the hot facial expression of our lover, and closing our eyes to integrate that passion.

What is your favorite way of kissing?