Playing on the Edge

Last fall I had a striking experience as  I was walking in Central Park. The weather was mild and the trees were just starting to green. My soul was soaking in the beauty of nature and felt very peaceful even in the middle of New York City.

After a meditative moment of gratefulness and peace, I felt pulled by shouts of joy toward a children’s playground sculpture in the park. Kids were having a great time experiencing the freedom of movement exhilarated by others like them expressing themselves with passion.

It was clear that boys and girls had a different way of expressing their joy of life. Most boys were playing daring games such as crawling on rocks and looking around to see if someone was admiring them. As though further energized by people like me looking at them, they kept climbing and jumping even faster, taking less and less time to secure their footing well before taking the next step. Parents were split between being worried and proud. Being admired taking risks seemed to tuned the kids on. Perhaps taking risks is a masculine quality… But then I saw a girl who seemed to outdo most boys. That was impressive. However most girls were playing on the ground enjoying sharing their toys with others and pushing each other on the swings.

I tried to analyze why it was so. Was the diversity in play because of socialization? Instead of answering my question, I decided to enjoy the diversity and the genuine pleasure experienced by the boys and girls playing and also by the men and women who were present there to create safety for them.

Would our sexual life be more spontaneous and exciting if we gave up the analyzing and trying to make sense of how nature wants to express itself through us?

I feel grateful to be alive and decided to play a little more freely myself.

Some wise person said: “If you are not on the edge you’re taking up too much space. “

How are you playing in your life? Are you allowing yourself to take some risks by pushing your boundaries of safety without falling off the rocks?

Photo: Encounter on a Net, by Diana Blackwell, Flikr.com

Effortless Orgasms Are Possible

I recently started working with a great looking woman who first came in my door so stressed that she could not sit still without constantly re-arranging her body. That first day, her eyes were speedily moving around in hypervigilance. She could not finish one sentence in the rush to get to the next.

What she said came from a rehearsed circular thinking in her head. She did not allow herself time to feel. She told me she hated herself and especially her body. She grew up with a self-righteous alcoholic father and a Catholic mother who did NOT allow herself or her children to feel feelings, especially those of pleasure.

She complained that she had a dark secret: she was 49 years old and she had never had an orgasm! All her friends were telling her of their great lovemaking, ending in earthshaking orgasms. . . Whether they were telling her the truth or not, she believed them and guessed there was something wrong with her.

Talking to Jane did not seem the best approach, because her rigid belief that there was something wrong with her would just filter out my words. I had to try something more direct. Read more

Financial Abundance and Sexual Expression

Financial abundance and sexual expression seem to go hand in hand for many.
How do you feel when you have an abundance of money and time? Do you feel sexually more vibrant, more romantically inclined, are you in a better mood to attract more of what you want?

This is important to remember especially during these financially challenging times that we are currently experiencing. People hold on to their money because they are afraid things will get worse, and things do get worse because everyone is holding on to their money. It is a vicious circle.  Are you asking yourself how you can break this circle?       Read more