Most people’s perception of Tantra is limited to controlling sex so you can have it for hours and hours in strange positions. Tantra is much more than that. It includes 64 arts that support you to be the most sensitive and accomplished lover of life and of another person. It includes the art of understanding the energy flow, of communicating deeply from your feelings, the art of romance, of setting up a room that will encourage you to create a mood that takes you higher into your fullest potential of vitality and passion, and more…

l embraced Tantra fully, and I teach it passionately because it has helped me to free myself from limiting emotional conclusions about sexuality, and to accept on all levels of my being that sex is an powerful force that amplifies any intention I hold. So if you intend to increase your love or vitality or abundance, your sexual expression is doing that. If you have the intention of connecting deeply with another and experiencing bliss together, sexuality becomes a very high expression of love, and learning to become the best lover you can becomes very important. Tantra encourages you to become the ultimate lover on all levels.

Tantra is a path that successfully unites sexuality with spirituality. It is the only spiritual approach I know of that faces the sexual challenges directly and teaches us how to use sex in a safe, and powerful way. It is a path to enlightenment, which can be reached by transcending our dualistic state of mind. Often we think one thing and feel another. Tantra uses our natural sexual energy to heal the split between body and spirit, between thinking and feeling, and helps you feel whole and really fulfilled.

It is not about how many hours you spend in sexual activities, although it helps with that too if you so desire. Tantra guides you to generate, heighten and transform sexual energy to more subtle energies as you channel it up through higher energy centers in the body (chakras). With the intention of transforming this powerful energy, you can create a new you.

Chakras are wheels of energy. The Hindu tradition believes that there are seven energy wheels that need to spin freely to be fully healthy and to move the maximum amount of energy. The first chakra is situated at the base of our spine. It connects us with the earth, and when it is open and balanced we feel safe. The second chakra is about sex, fluidity, and juiciness; the third – the solar plexus – is about expression of willpower and self-esteem; the fourth – at the heart level – is about love and compassion; the fifth – at the throat level – is about free and honest communication; the sixth – at the forehead level – is about intuition; and the seventh – in the middle of the brain – is about connection with the part of us that is beyond our personality and reaches into the spirit.

The idea of Tantra is to balance these energy centers and to raise the vibrations of pleasure from the first and second chakras to the higher chakras to express self-esteem, love, honest communication, intuition, and finally to merge with into your ultimate transcendent reality. It transforms the sexual energy that is coiled in the lower chakras into love and into light.

Tantra is also a path to complete intimacy with oneself and with another being. Many find it easier to be physically intimate than to share true emotional intimacy. We hold back on letting others see us as we are, especially the parts of us that we judge as bad. Many are more interested in learning lovemaking techniques, which Tantra offers in abundance, than to committing to emotional and spiritual intimacy and absolute honesty with a partner. It seems logical that, in order to achieve the highest state of union with All That Is, we must first be willing to be fully open with at least one human being.

Furthermore, even on a less cosmic level, in order to fully heal ourselves from the shame of our imperfect state of being human, we long for a person who loves us as we are. However, in order to be able to allow that love to penetrate us and heal us, we must first be willing to fully accept ourselves with all our desirable and undesirable qualities.

Tantra gives us plenty of suggestions about how self-acceptance can be reached, and guides you gently to go beyond self-acceptance to honor our true God self.

Sex is very important in our lives. It is a powerful creative force and it leads to orgasm. Orgasm is probably the closest some of us get to the experience of enlightenment. For a more-or-less brief moment, we get to forget ourselves, our problems, our egos, and just be with pure energy, with God.

Tantra guides you gradually to lengthen the peak experience of sexual ecstasy so that, in a way, we get to “hang out” with God longer. This expands our consciousness so that, when you come down to the dualistic plane, you see yourselves and life in a new way. You can actually experience the love that supports the whole cosmos. It is awesome.

When I started playing with the idea of making Tantra my path, I was surprised to notice my resistance to practicing it, finding “plausible” excuses not to find time for it. I remember feeling a similar resistance to my meditation practices. My resistance was confusing to me because here I had found a path that allowed me to use pleasure to reach God and I was avoiding it. Why? After some inner search I realized that this pleasure was different from the previously felt pleasure, which was mixed with pain and guilt. This, however, was pure pleasure, and I did not know how to be with it. Slowly, with a lot of patience and practice, I started to build up my capacity to sustain pure pleasure. I also had to overcome the voice of my internalized mother, who condemned me for feeling sexual pleasure in the first place.

With practice I was able to relax my body while being at the same time in a highly aroused state. Somehow these two states are not mutually exclusive, as one might be tempted to think. In Tantra one can relax because there is no issue of performance. The process itself is the reward. Only through being fully in the process can one reach the highest orgasm.

Do you necessarily need a partner for Tantra love? No. Many tantric exercises can be done alone. In fact, learning to love and honor your own body is an important step toward the tantric experience with a partner.

Tantra helped me break old taboos and heal my past emotional and physical traumas connected with my sexuality. I can now use this additional experiential knowledge to help woman, men and couples in my New York.

To my great joy there are also people who are already fully sex positive and emotionally healthy and feel great with high erotic energy flowing through their bodies. It is a pleasure to assist those people to achieve higher levels of ecstasy alone or with their partner, whether I can help them in private coaching, or in the wider sharing of a workshop.

This is important to remember especially during these financially challenging times that we are currently experiencing. People hold on to their money because they are afraid things will get worse, and things do get worse because everyone is holding on to their money. It is a vicious circle.  Are you asking yourself how you can break this circle?      

Tantra sees that in order for us to receive nourishment from the Earth,we need to open up our root center at the base of our spine: the root chakra. When this chakra is relaxed/open you feel safe. When you are in fear, it contracts and creates a block that disconnects you from the energy that the earth is always ready to share with you. To open yourself back up to the grounding energy, all you need to do is tune in and feel this ever present subtle energy in other energy centers, such as the heart center and feel it expand.

Here’s an easy step: Think of someone you love and open your heart. Notice the emotional space that puts you in. Notice what happens physically, with how you hold your body, tenseness/looseness in your muscles, your breath.

Have you ever tried to breathe more deeply when you are afraid? Do you notice that when you are afraid, you breathe very shallowly and tend to hold your breath more? Have you noticed that when you do that, your fear increases instead of diminishing?

The ever present energy of love can always help you get into the space of experimenting with other energy fields. Consciously breathing more deeply helps you tune into the place where you trust the Earth to support you and provide you with life serving energy. When you stay conscious of this energy, it is powerfully at your disposal for anything you deeply desire. When you are afraid of not being able to survive, the energy does not move and thus creates stagnation.

The kind of breath that will help you break through the fear is easy per se, but usually difficult to implement because of habits of shallow, high breathing which fills up the top of the lungs only. Furthermore, the shallow exhale does not get rid of all the poisons which are kept in the stale air.

When you experiment with breathing to connect with the nourishing energy that is abundantly available you become optimistic and audacious. The flow of creativity changes your experience from victim of what is happening to powerful co-creator. Have you observed that when you are full and happy you have the greatest ideas?

As a Tantra facilitator, I discover that lately people need support with problems with lack of desire, erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. Some men who fear loss of erection make themselves ejaculate quickly, before they lose it.

Women complain more often than usual that their husbands do not feel like making love as often as before; or if their men do approach them sexually they do it to release their tensions and end the lovemaking fast without waiting for their woman to fully open and become excited, ready to explode in joy with them.

The good news is that both economic recession and sexual recession are created by the mind that projects problems. This is actually good news because we are faced with the fact that if we create the problem we can also solve it with a different approach.

Tantra teaches a meditative approach to sex and to life that helps you keep steady during stormy times, strengthening faith in your human ability to create a different reality that helps you feel free and fulfilled. There are Tantric breathing techniques and other practices that you can do to relax fully into a peaceful place no matter the circumstances. Have you ever wished you could do it?

If you stay relaxed you can see opportunities no matter what the economic situation is. There are people who became rich during recessions. Those were the people who could see outside the box because they opened up to the infinite possibility of creation that are always available. Tantra teaches methods of relaxing and open up to the immense possibility of pleasure and connection that are always available to us no matter how much money we have. However, you don’t need to study tantra to become conscious of this nourishing inner energy field.

You might have noticed that when fear grips you you hinder the flow of breath to almost non-existent. When you consciously breathe with the intention of opening up the painful block you can actually feel the block opening and energy streaming in. It would serve you to become conscious of your inner energy field and practice tuning in when you are feeling good. You will notice that when you feel good you are in the flow, in the moment, in the NOW.
What scares us is our projection to a bleaker future. Do this tuning in often during the day so you build the experience of re-connected with this energy. Our thinking mind often takes us away from it. Practice can help us shift when we need it.

After having become adept at changing your focus to the now, you have a better chance to do it even when you feel blocked. You can begin to tap into this field at will and become your own healer and a great lover. I’m sure you can see the importance of learning this simple yet power technique. Feeling sexually abundant and financially abundant is key to our fulfillment.